Cutthroat Cupcakes

I’m a teacher.

I can’t remember if I’ve mentioned that before.  But I am, and I teach Language Arts to 5th graders (which is fabulous and I love it and them).  Every week, I write a new “word of the week” on my board and the kids get a point any time they use any word of the week (or any vocab word, for that matter).  This last week’s word was “incontrovertible”, for example.  Our 5th grade class is split up into four groups, so whichever group gets the most points at the end of the grading period gets an edible reward.

What’s this have to do with cupcakes, you ask? So, normally, my reward is some kind of hard candy, like Jolly Ranchers because pure sugar makes me much less nervous in terms of allergens than basically any other type of candy.  Having said that, I’ve been slacking in the punctuality department when it comes to delivering on the promise.  Combine that with a recital every Monday of that weekend’s baking extravagances and you’ve got some crafty kids who say that you owe them homemade goodies because you’ve made them wait.

Which is a fair point, I’d say.

And leads me to today’s adventures.  The first adventure was a grand success: salted brown butter rice krispie treats.  My poor husband has been giving me the puppy-dog eyes all day ever since I told him I was taking most of the rice krispie treats to school.  So at least that was a success.

But then the cupcakes.  Lord.

The first batch of cupcakes was weird.  It asked to whip up a couple of egg whites and then fold them in at the end.  Ooooooookaaaaaaaayyy.  Which made the texture “thick and velvety” like described but highly inclined to burn.  Ajgfkalghiwoe;agheia;.  Which means that basically all of my first batch was sad and unable to be used.  Hence the post title: cutthroat cupcakes are the ones where you spend all that time, energy, and butter (so much butter) on something which ultimately is disappointing and sad.  Grrrr.  Which then meant I had to scour the web for another recipe, this time specifically looking for a high-altitude recipe.  Although weird as well (cold butter chunks straight into the flour mixture and then a milk/egg/vanilla mixture, almost like a pie crust or cookies), my hopes are flying high, not dashed at all on the rocks of despair below me!

For them, I’m making a blackberry/raspberry buttercream frosting.  Because who wants boring frosting?? NO ONE.  Plus, the berries cut the sweetness of the buttercream with a little tartness, so it’s light and refreshing and doesn’t taste cloying.

Now if only I had time to clean my house today. . .

Here’s a picture of the two cupcakes side-by-side.  The better batch is the top one.

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Now a picture of the sad one:

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Now a picture of the happy one!  Yay!

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And finally, pictures of the final products:

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Finally, something I can be proud to give my kids tomorrow.

Recipe link:


2 thoughts on “Cutthroat Cupcakes

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